back to school day
August 31, 2009
Today was the “meet and greet” at school. The kids were so excited to see their classmates, meet their teachers, and get their desks organized. It was a great morning for them. It was exciting for me too. I love seeing them so excited. It’s such a special time. But, weighing on my mind is the absence of the Teaching Assistant for the first day of school tomorrow and at the training today. Oh well. The good news is I continue to get new and good candidates. We were at Parent Night and discussing the job with candidates just before, during, and after! So, we’re getting close I think. And, the teachers all assure me that my son will be fine without a Teaching Assistant for a little while - especially since there will be 2 teachers in his classroom full time the first 2 weeks.
It was a very long day between the meet and greet in both classrooms, the TA interviews, Parent Night - not to mention I do have a job as well! But, onward and upward and things will be fine.
preparing for back-to-school tomorrow
August 30, 2009
So, school starts tomorrow. As much as I was on top of things making sure everything and everybody was ready for my son and the other boys entering the program this year, I may not have a teaching assistant in place for him tomorrow.
In the first round of interviews, my top candidate was offered the job, the second candidate was given to another family. That top candidate accepted the offer and then rescinded the next week (her fiance took a job in the bay area). So we went back to interviewing. In the second round of interviews, my top candidate was offered the job, the second candidate was given to another family. That top candidate accepted the offer and then rescinded the next week (she was offered a last minute head teaching position). So Friday (yes, this past Friday) I went back to interviewing. Fortunately I still had some resumes from the last round. And, believe it or not, I came away with two great candidates. Fortunately, I don’t have any more families to give one of those candidates to! But, this weekend we’re negotiating and determining whether one of these candidates will work out.
I really have to dig deep to try to determine what the universe is trying to tell me right now. The other two families have their TA’s starting tomorrow and attending the training that I set up with the school. All 10 teachers that will be teaching the 2nd graders along with the Teaching Assistants are all receiving training for 4 hours tomorrow. My son is the only one that may not have a TA present.
All I can do is keep putting one foot in front of the other. But these are the days that I become so angry at the Seattle Public School District. These are the days that I want to go back to them and demand they fork over the money for everything I’m doing privately and on my own for my son. Over the past year, I’ve had confirmation that my assessment of the SPSD was accurate. They, indeed, are not capable of handling high functioning kids with behavior challenges. I can’t say publicly where I received this information but it is several sources that know more about the SPSD SPED services than anyone.
One foot in front of the other…. and positive thinking.
I can’t believe it’s been 10 weeks
August 22, 2009
I can’t believe the kids have been out of school for 10 weeks already. How is it possible that 10 weeks have passed? Well, the last time I wrote, I had made a commitment to take care of myself this summer. And, I’ve done that. It’s interesting, however, that when you focus on yourself how much you learn about yourself. My fitness instructor was really terrific. She was always on the lookout for total body issues and not just your fitness. She had recommended to me that I get an adrenal stress test done. It’s interesting because a friend of mine who is a naturopath had suggested that perhaps my cortisol levels had something to do with my weight gain since my son’s diagnosis. Typical of me, I shrugged it off as a potential excuse - I am not one that likes excuses for what I considered a personal failing two years ago. But after two summers of rigorous fitness and not losing a single pound from it, I started to wonder if she could be right - afterall, I’ve never struggled with my weight. Then that study came out about mom’s of autism having very low levels of cortisol (I posted these studies in my blog). And then my fitness instructor, based on certain symptoms I was exhibiting, suggested I get tested. It was as if someone was pounding me over the head with this recommendation and I finally heard it. So, I got tested. And, indeed, I was suffering from adrenal fatigue in stage 3 (stage 4 is the disease stage). And now that I understand how cortisol works in the body, I can pretty much track the whole process from the day of my son’s diagnosis. Needless to say, it was a good thing I finally chose this summer to take care of myself. But, the workouts were hard on me. Usually with a 10 week class, you should be able to withstand the exercise level getting more and more difficult each week. This was not the case with me. And as the weeks went on, I experienced more and more fatigue - mostly to my joints. But I lost a few pounds and inches and it felt good to be exercising so hard. And, I have been concentrating on figuring out the best diet (not necessarily a weight loss diet but an overall diet) for me and I’m on a supplement schedule that should help resolve the cortisol issues. And, my doctor is involved in further testing as well. So I feel like I’m in better control right now. Things aren’t resolved and I’m not where I’d like to be. But, I don’t feel as powerless.
So, this summer was interesting as the autism thing goes. Just because I decide to take time for myself, certainly doesn’t mean that autism gets put on hold! I thought I would summarize in the positive and negative categories.
Negatives:
A crazy nanny that I had hired told me after one day that I was an irresponsible mother and in complete denial of my son’s aspergers! Couldn’t even give her the time of day to explain to her how wrong she was or to defend myself and she no longer came in contact with my children. But, the idea that I would be attacked in this way is unimaginable.
Someone that I considered a friend disclosed my son’s aspergers to someone in an inappropriate manner and without asking me about it first. It then caused me the hassle of having to defend myself, which a good mom should never have to do to anyone.
Another person (can you tell I’m not disclosing names or details with any of these scenarios) tells me things (maybe lecturing?) that I should be doing at home with my son, everyone seems to think they know better even though they have never been a mother let alone a mother of a child with any kind of autism. And then again I feel the need to defend myself - that I choose my battles carefully with my children at home and I don’t sweat the small stuff - which is why I believe I have a better relationship with my son than most anyone.
In my work, I deal with constant battling between the autism community – between biomedical and medical interventions, between to vaccinate or not to vaccinate, between high functioning and low functioning, between aspergers and autism, between private services and public services, between all disabilities and autism – no wonder we aren’t getting anywhere with autism – even the parent population can’t work together without tearing each other apart!
There are two new families that will have teaching assistants for their child in my son’s grade. I helped them with the process of finding and hiring their teaching assistants - feeling very responsible for making sure the program at the school continues to be successful. We found 3 excellent candidates and hired them. Just my luck, mine backed out on me with just 1 and a half weeks left before school starts. So I had to make a mad dash and start the recruitment process all over again!
Positives:
I had a couple of really great nannies that did a terrific job with my kids. I am grateful.
I have great friends who, despite asperger’s, are fully supportive and still want to hang out with us! I am so grateful.
Despite the battles I choose and the ones I don’t choose to fight at home, my son is doing GREAT! We saw so much progress this summer in so many areas, particularly social and behavioral, which was truly amazing. Again, I am grateful not only for the amazing work of the behavioral specialists but also just the divine intervention that I know is working in our favor.
I have met so many wonderful mothers and fathers of children with autism who aren’t negative, who are fully supportive, who are smart and have good ideas for how to solve problems, and who are full of valuable information. I want to soak up all of their energy and ideas.
Finally, we have hired someone that I believe will do an outstanding job as a teaching assistant and I’m excited for the school year to begin.
I’ll begin regular blogging now as we prepare for the new school year.
you should attend this conference - some great topics and speakers
August 16, 2009
Restoring Hope 2009… a Conference for Families Living with Autism
October 15, 2009
7:30 am-8:30 am Registration & Continental Breakfast
7:30 am-4:00 pm Resource Fair
8:30 am-4:00 pm Conference Sessions
Noon-1:30 pm Honoring Caregivers Luncheon (separate registration)
Location
Hyatt Regency Bellevue, 900 Bellevue Way NE, Bellevue, WA 98004
You will have the opportunity to hear from the following experts
Opening Session Keynote Speaker – Dr. Bryan King, Seattle Children’s
Luncheon Guest Speaker – Lynn Stern Feiges, Author Sibling Stories
Treatment Track:
- effective behavioral interventions – Dr. Ann Uherek
- sleep disorders – Dr. Yemiserach Kifle
- biomedical interventions – Dr. Gary Stobbe
- medications – Dr. Alan Unis
Education Track:
- successful school/family partnerships – Larry Davis
- evidence-based school practices – Dr. Scott Spaulding
- positive behavior supports – Dr. Kathleen Zanolli
- social skills training – Glenna Clouse
Family Support Track:
- maintaining your marriage – Beth Jensen
- handling challenging behaviors – Cindy Harvey
- parents as long term care providers – TBD
- families facing hard choices – panel of parents
Lifespan Track:
- sexuality education – Dr. Steve Becker
- transitioning to employment – TBD
- housing options – Sunridge Ranch, Tessera, LEO
- risk and safety skills – Autism Speaks
Cost
Conference Only (early bird) $75
Conference & Luncheon (early bird) $150
Conference Only (after Sept. 23) $100
Conference & Luncheon (after Sept. 23) $175
Scholarships are available.
Resource Fair
An all-day resource fair is being held in partnership with autism organizations serving our region and will provide families with resources available in the community.
Honoring Caregivers Luncheon
Join us to honor a caregiver who has made a difference in the life of a child with autism. More information at: www.tessera.org/luncheon.html
For more information & to register for the conference, please visit: www.tessera.org/conference.html
I am looking forward to seeing the movie “Adam”
August 8, 2009
and I can’t wait to see the HBO film about Temple Grandin too!
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/04/health/04aspe.html?_r=1
Educational pioneer? Not this state
August 1, 2009
In case you missed it, Washington just flunked the test for school reform.
http://www.thenewstribune.com/opinion/story/825757.html
